Dear Poor Lucky Me,
I live in Chicago too, and I’ve been reading about how the city privatized the parking meters. In some places downtown the meters cost $3 an hour, you have to pay in quarters, and if the meter is broken or full you can get a ticket.
I just don’t understand how this could be possible? I mean who’s idea was this? What else are they going to privatize? Are these people specifically out to get me or something? I can’t walk around with 500 quarters in my pocket for god’s sake!
Signed,
I’m Pissed Off
Dear I’m Pissed Off,
I’m pissed off too. I don’t understand how local government can just sell shit that I assume my tax dollars were funding. I mean isn’t that stuff partially mine? I don’t know all the ins and outs of urban economics or even who my local politicians are; I just know that I should be rewarded by finding a broken meter by being allowed to park there for free. Is that too much to ask?
I guess for the time being we do have to walk around with bags of quarters. Or keep forcing foreign currency into the meters until they break. I think if enough parking meters get vandalized- I mean broken- the evil company that owns them might set up a credit card payment option. At the very least they’ll be annoyed. Normally I don’t condone putting more negative energy into the universe, but this is a special case.
I also just found out that those bastard cameras that keep taking pictures of me running yellow lights and sending me tickets in the mail are also owned by a private company. It’s like the devil has set up a privatized empire to bother everyone and give us all bullshit tickets that we don’t even know about until they show up in the mail one day! How can you talk your way out of a traffic ticket if a devil-camera is in charge? It’s just not right, and if I wasn’t so lazy I wouldn’t stand for it. As it is, I lie on my couch a lot and bitch at the ceiling about this awful state of affairs.
Sincerely,
Poor Lucky Me
