I would like to take this opportunity to make an important announcement:
I will no longer politely look away when I see an exposed butt crack. In fact, I am going to tap people on the should and say with a friendly smile “excuse me but I can see your butt crack”. I know that the offenders can feel the sunshine and breeze brush past their coin slot and must thus conclude that they are forcing me to look. I don’t want to look. Unless it’s the butt crack of a famous person. Then I want to look and take a picture and consider selling it to the National Enquirer.
Also of note: more and more people seem to have an extra long butt crack. Assuming it starts at the usual place, it runs all the way up their bottem, bursts out of the back of their jeans and reaches almost to the small of their back. What is the cause of this? Can I still be offended or is this a dire medical condition. I guess I have no choice: I’ll have to ask the next owner of a gigantic butt crack that I see.
