Dear Readers,
Living in Chicago, one can’t help but notice how many efforts are made to raise the city’s revenue.
This gave me an idea: I’ve decided to print up my own tickets and hand them out for all kinds of infractions ranging from telling boring stories to being naked too long in the gym locker room. Fines will go from $10 to $150, which I think is fair.
Does anyone want to get in on this with me so we can have an unbeatable coalition and raise our personal revenues?
Sincerely,
Poor Lucky Me
If you need help, I’ve been assembling a list of banal things that should be outlawed, such as putting walnuts in brownies, pretending to disagree with something just to make yourself look smarter, running an establishment that sells burgers but NOT french fries (I mean REALLY) and myriad other crimes against humanity. Can I start the Denver chapter?
If a place exists where they sell burgers but no fries, a PLM outpost is mandatory. Please submit your essays/ideas to advice@poorluckyme.com