Dear Readers,
A strange thing has started happening in my apartment building. Almost every Friday and Saturday, between 4-5 in the morning, some one starts knocking on the door across the hall from my apartment.

The knocks are polite at first. Tap. Tap. Tap. Sometimes I hear a stage whispered “Heeeeeeeyyy”. But the person becomes more insistent. Pounding fists give way to kicking. The kicking gets so hard that it rattles the owners door knocker. Then abruptly, the door opens. No one apologizes. I can’t hear any explanation. The door opens, the offending visitor is let in, and we all pretend nothing is amiss.

My greatest frustration is that because of the angle of the door, I can’t see who’s rapping on the door from my peephole. I’m too weirded out to open the door and check out what’s happening. And I’m way too cowardly to fling open my door and yell “Shut the hell”. Also I wear unpredictable sleep-ware: I’m not always in a state to be seen by strangers. I don’t feel right taping a note on this person’s door, and I don’t feel right about complaining to the building manager without confronting the resident.

Should I switch to full length pajamas and go bananas on these fools next Friday night? I think my temper has simmered just enough.

What would you do?

Poor Lucky Me

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...


  1. Sherlock Holmes says:

    Hmm. Sounds to me like your neighbor might be selling drugs and the person knocking on the door is a regular customer. Think about it: Only happens on weekend nights. The soft knocking doesn’t wake the seller, but loud knocking does. And (the kicker) the person is eventually let into the apartment with no arguing or talking.

    I would ask the building management to approach your neighbor and politely request that he/she refrain from accepting visitors in the wee hours of the morning.

  2. a former band-aid says:

    if it were drug related it wouldn’t happen with such regularity. no, I think your neighbor is having a fling with a musician who works late on weekends only. could be a bartender…but it sounds like something one of those rascal musicians would do. a late night booty call. definitely dig out the flannel nightgown, put in some hair curlers and jump into the hall yelling “what’s going on!” the next time it happens. i would totally do that, yes i would. who cares what they think of the crazy person across the hall? your readers implore you to get to the bottom of this!

  3. Toothpick says:

    Sounds like Tiger Woods is subletting a late night shag-pad across the hall from you.

  4. cal says:

    Switch to full-length PJs? No, sleep in either a) a pair of old and scary looking Dickies coveralls (a la Jason Voorhees) or b) the Mark Wahlburg Tyvec suit (complete with hairnet, gloves and booties) from the end of The Departed. THEN go apeshit on your neighbors. They’ll be more inclined to listen if they think you might kill them.

Speak Your Mind