Can’t Stands No More – Wednesday March 24th

The party got out of hand...

The party got out of hand...

Dear Poor Lucky Me,


I had to take my car to the shop- it’s only 4 months old but there was a wiring problem and the radio was fuzzy. They made me come back twice before finally giving me a loaner car. The loaner was such a P.O.S. I was afraid to drive it on the highway. I could feel it rattling! I was really annoyed. The worst part is that it had advertisements for the dealership all over it. Am I overreacting?


I Tend To Overreact


Dear I Tend To Overreact,


Not only are you reacting appropriately, but you are exposing those car dealership bastards!


The last time I had to get a loaner car they acted like such turds when I returned it because I had Sharpied out all the stupid bumper stickers advertising the dealership. I was doing them a favor though- because if I were them I wouldn’t want anyone to notice how often loaner cars have to go out while they fix the overpriced crap car they sold someone three months ago. I also spilled a Slurpie on the radio and shorted out the dashboard electronics, but I don’t really see how that’s my fault.


What? Are you never supposed to eat or drink or cry or sleep or vomit or breed feeder mice or urinate or allow homeless people to camp out in the loaner car? This is America! We won’t stand to be oppressed by arbitrary rules anymore. Who cares if I’m planning to host a bachelor party in the backseat of the loaner car? Is that crime?


Hey speaking of that bachelor party, I wonder if it’s a bad idea to serve ribs. Is that too messy for a Kia Sophia?


Poor Lucky Me

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