Thursday September 9th

Sometimes I have a hard time listening to other people talk about their babies. Only sometimes. During those times, I wrestle my sneer into a smile. It makes me feel like a bad person. I’m not jealous exactly, I’m not resentful, I’m just…sad. It’s like if you’ve never been to Europe and you really want to go, and you have to spend two hours listening to someone’s great stories about their fantastic trip to Paris. Actually that sounds like jealousy.

 

I’m just not a jealous person in my regular life, so this is new to me. Maybe this is one of those times that I’m not supposed to be so hard on myself. Easier said than done. If you pride yourself on being one of the few people in the world who can be genuinely happy for other people…it’s pretty confusing to keep getting punched in the neck with jealousy.

 

I used to feel like my underlying emotion was happiness or enthusiasm. Then the underlying emotion was sadness. Now I feel slightly frustrated all the time. Frustrated and overwhelmed. Maybe it’s time to go back to yoga, because this frustration is…frustrating.

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Comments

  1. Kelly says:

    Did you try Bikram? As opposed to baseball, there IS crying in Bikram.

  2. Suzy says:

    It’s all part of the process babe. The frustration, the jealousy, thee feeling of being overwhelmed by just everything. It doesn’t go away (at least it hasn’t for me yet) but it does get easier. And yoga may definitely help. xxx

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