During my current mood swing, I have decided I’m finished mourning. I don’t have anymore sadness left in me, so now I’m back to normal. Phew. That was challenging, but now it’s over and I’m sure I’m be completely fine from here on out.
In accordance with my new mood (however long it may last) I would like to write about my amazing new diet. It’s so easy and fun, just about anyone can do it! Now here’s the system:
First, become a compulsive exerciser. Get up earlier and earlier in the morning to take classes at the gym, and jog when you walk your dog at night- even when it’s snowy and you’re wearing snow boots and a huge puffy coat and people that you lumber past mistake you for a homeless lady.
Next, find yourself a competent mental health professional and spend thousands of dollars on therapy. I prefer a psychiatrist, because they meet my personal needs, but you can choose any reputable therapist. Make a weekly appointment and allow yourself to puke out your neurosis and phobias, thus appearing normal the rest of the week.
Third: Visit a Chinese herbalist and purchase various herbs and tinctures for approximately $350. Put complete faith in the effectiveness of herbs, even when required to fill your belly-button with strange smelling concoction.
Finally, join Weight Watchers and bask in your new topic of obsession- points. Take great pleasure in eating all your fruits and vegetables and remember that the point of food is to fuel your body and mind, not to be used as an emotional-hole-filler.
This amazing combination of self-help remedies will remind you that you’re not powerless, stuck, or a turd.
RIGHT ON!!!!! NOt feeling powerless can help a lot! Getting active and focussing can help a lot, too. If that doesn’t work, do talk to a doctor about meds. There are women in my own ‘support group’ who have been on meds out of necessity during conception efforts, pregnancy and after. Stress reduction is also a ‘wellness’ exercise for yourself (and a future child) whether that involves meds or not.
Glad you’re getting help and figuring out a ‘new normal’ instead of feeling stuck. Your sarcasm is not lost me and made me smile with pride for your determination in this ‘mood’….. I’m glad the bad is not as bad as it has been, and that the good is better than it used to be. You’re doing it. You’re working through this stuff and moving forward! Right on!
A turd???????????????