Baby’s First Bossiness – Monday June 27th

I think this baby is going to be very sophisticated and worldly. I can already tell the baby will be very European by the way s/he wants me to take siesta every day after lunch. S/he will also enjoy the food of many different cultures, such as Greece. That’s obviously why I’ve been marched, against my will, by the fetus to the Greek diner three times in two weeks for gyros.

I don’t know what country has the custom of waking people in the middle of the night to poop after having no action for three days, but my baby will feel at home in that country as well. Samoa and other Micronesian nations will welcome this fruit of my womb, for s/he already seems to be partial to big and fat people, with cellulite on their arms and fingers.

What a powerful baby! Only 13 weeks in utero and already such a presence. We have long arguments over whether we’ll eat fruit or microwavable pretzels with nacho cheese. I am a better compromiser than the baby is. When I don’t give in, the baby makes me grow more white beard hair.

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  1. Marilyn says:

    lol…. amazing superpowers that baby of yours has!!! Love your humour…..

  2. AL says:

    Oh my gosh, you’re pregnant!! Congratulations!!!

    Pretzels with nacho cheese – yum – I like the way this baby thinks :-)

    (thinking of you and this new son or daughter)

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