![\"paul_hogan_as_michael_j_crocodile_dundee\"](\"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/10\/paul_hogan_as_michael_j_crocodile_dundee-216x300.jpg\" "\\"paul_hogan_as_michael_j_crocodile_dundee\\"")
Dear Poor Lucky Me,<\/p>\nDear Poor Lucky Me,<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
I just don’t understand what I was doing before I got my iPhone. <\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\nHow did I get anywhere without the little GPS? How did I entertain myself when I had to wait in lines without Scrabble and Solitaire and Tetris and email and You Tube on my phone? <\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\nMore importantly, what will I ever do if I’m out somewhere and the battery runs out. Or, God forbid, I lose it? I think I’d be wandering around the city, crying and scared until some one picked me up and forced me into sex slavery.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\nIs this a common fear?<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\nSigned,
\nI’m Delicate<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\n <\/p>\n \nWell I can say with certainty that before I had my iPhone I rarely left the house. I used to have a compass in my car that kept me oriented, but if I had to travel by foot I was terrified. <\/p>\n <\/p>\n I tried to learn how to tell time by watching Crocodile Dundee on a continuous loop one weekend, but I ended up just falling in love with Paul Hogan. To this day there is a court order that prohibits me from calling or sending any packages to his home. That’s unfortunate because I think that Paul, or “Croc” as I call him, and I would be the greatest of lovers and friends. We’d have that kind of relationship where you just feel like you can’t even breath with the other person I had a bidet installed in my apartment so that if he ever does come over, he’ll have a place to wash his socks.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \nYour fears about sobbing in public and being sold into sex slavery are very common, and very real. I know they’re real because I live across the street from where Dick’s Last Resort used to be. Every Friday and Saturday night I get asked where Dick’s relocated and I can just tell it’s code name for something really scary. Because no one in their right mind actually wants to go to that restaurant\/bar, and you know it. <\/p>\n <\/p>\n \nSincerely, Dear Poor Lucky Me, I just don’t understand what I was doing before I got my iPhone. How did I get anywhere without the little GPS? How did I entertain myself when I had to wait in lines without Scrabble and Solitaire and Tetris and email and You Tube on my phone? … Continue reading “Addressing Legitamate Fears of the 21st Century – Thursday October 22nd”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1168","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1168","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1168"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1168\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3675,"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1168\/revisions\/3675"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1168"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1168"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1168"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nDear I’m Delicate,<\/p>\n
\nPoor Lucky Me<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"