Ok, now that I have remembered I can control the regular part of my depression, I’m in a better spot. I joined Weight Watchers last night and feel so much better. I’ve got a plan, I know I can do it, I know it works. When I was dieting on my own, every muck up was reinforcing the nagging voice in my head that thinks I’m a loser or an idiot or a bad mom. It’s like I was deliberately hanging around in a corner of self-loathing.<\/p>\n
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Well not anymore my friends! Not anymore! I’ve joined a community! I’ve given myself tools to succeed. It’s a lot like training a dog actually. You can’t just let the dog wander around deciding for itself how to fit in in your home. You have to give it guidelines and opportunities for success. Then you can’t yell at it when it has an accident here or there. You just keep giving it love.<\/p>\n
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So today is day one. I feel outrageously relieved and hopeful and in control. I don’t know how I’ll feel tomorrow, or Sunday (weekends are the worst), but today is good. <\/p>\n
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My grief can sit and stew and simmer. But my depression is going to get smacked down. And then maybe I’ll have the confidence to get another bean in my belly. Maybe I’ll stop thinking of my womb as Tommy Jr’s house, and be able to welcome the idea of another baby living in there. <\/p>\n
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I want to be better, I really do. It’s just easier to be sad, it feels so natural. But I’ve known for quite a while now that the hardest thing is usually the thing you need most. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Ok, now that I have remembered I can control the regular part of my depression, I’m in a better spot. I joined Weight Watchers last night and feel so much better. I’ve got a plan, I know I can do it, I know it works. When I was dieting on my own, every muck up … Continue reading “Nice and Easy- Tuesday January 25”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2338","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2338","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2338"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2338\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3443,"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2338\/revisions\/3443"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2338"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2338"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.poorluckyme.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2338"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}