Dear Poor Lucky Me,
I’ve been reading about Lindsay Lohan’s break up with that D.J. I feel really bad for her! She’s not the first person to go through rehab a few times, freak out and try and run some one down with a car, ho herself out all over town and get dumped and act crazy. I’d like to reach out to her and let her know I understand and I feel for her.
Why is everyone giving her such a hard time?
Signed,
Big Fan of Big Red
Dear Big Fan,
I think we can all relate to some break up insanity. Like, is it really that abnormal to do donuts on your exes’ lawn while playing “The Reason” by Hoobastank loud enough to cover the sounds of your sobs? Or to throw eggs at your exes’ car while it’s parked at their work place and their co-workers watch you from the window as you run out of eggs and start tearing at your clothes and hair and screaming “You’re gonna regret leaving me! You’ll never find another person like me” then collapse on the pavement and cry until the cops get there? Or hack into your exes’ computer and email their boss sexually suggestive messages hoping they’ll get fired and have to come back to you for comfort and rent money and because you also burned all their clothes when they left for work?
The point is, love makes everyone a little insane. It makes some of us very insane. It even makes some of us criminally insane. I guess people are giving Lohan a hard time because her behavior holds a mirror up to everyone who’s lost their mind a bit after a break up. Also I think people are bothered by how she thinks she’s a great actress because she was cute in The Parent Trap and got a good part in Mean Girls but really she sort of sucks.
Sincerely,
Poor Lucky Me
I think it’s sort of sad that Lindsay doesn’t get to have any normal experiences without them being broadcast all of the place by scumbag paparazzi.